Church and Religion

I haven't updated in awhile. I haven't felt like writing much. My life has taken a huge turn over the last few weeks. Jason and I have been attending church for a little over a month. It's a completely new experience for us. Although we've each been to church a handful of times in the past, this is the first time we've actually wanted to go and are enjoying it.

What is strange to me, is that I become very overwhelmed in church. I can't explain it, but I'm brought to tears almost every sermon. Not tears of sadness, not happiness either. I just become overwhelmed with emotion because the words our Pastor is saying really seem to strike a chord in my heart and mind. I feel that this is what has been missing my whole life.

Since going to church, I've been trying to become a better person in my thoughts and actions. I've been reading the bible almost every night and I'm now praying regularly. I feel that God has blessed us. Jason has a wonderful job, we have a beautiful home, and we are genuinely happy.

I still question a lot of things about religion, one of my biggest struggles was trying to wrap my head around "every sin is equal" How can one person murder someone, and another person lie to someone and it's considered to be the same in God's eyes? Then my brother said something that made it click, "Think of Jesus as your lawyer." Because in the end, on judgement day, it is He that died for our sins. Who am I to say what is right and wrong in God's eyes? How can I be so foolish as to think my opinion of what sin is worse than another sin actually matters in His brilliant plan?

In other news, got my first root canal this morning. The pain was minimal, but now.. 10 hours later.. i'm hurting pretty bad. Time for some Tylenol, then off to bed.